Dear Mr. Ashely...

My beloved toon is on the auction block and the word on the street is that the Nigerians are interested. I found a copy of the offer on the internet, and I think the future is bright at Newcastle:

Dear Sir,

I am Mr.David Mark, an Auditor of a BANK OF THE NORTH INTERNATIONAL, ABUJA(FCT). I have the courage to Crave indulgence for this important business believing that you will never let me down either now or in the future.

Someyears ago, an American Mining consultant/contractor with the Nigeria National Petroleum Consortium made a numbered time (fixed) deposit for twelve calendarmonths, valued 400 MILLION POUNDS in a Nigerian account. On maturity, the bank sent a routine notification to his forwarding address but got no reply.

After a month, The bank sent another reminder and finally his contractemployers, the Nigerian National Petroleum Consortium wrote to inform the bankthat he died without MAKING A WILL, and all attempts by the British Embassy to trace his next of kin was fruitless. I therefore, made further investigation and discovered that the beneficiary was an immigrant from Jamaica and only recently obtained British citizenship. He did not declare any kin or relations in all his official documents, including his Bank deposit paper work.

This money total amount 400 MILLION POUNDS is still sitting in my bank as a dormant Account. No one will ever come forward to claim it, and according toNigerian Banking policy, after some years, the money will revert to the ownership of the Nigerian Petroleum Consortium if the account owner is certified dead.

This is the situation, and my proposal is that I am looking for a foreigner who will stand in as the next of kin to beneficiary, and OPEN a Bank Account abroad to facilitate the transfer of this money, in exchange for some consideration. I am thinking your stock in Newcastle United Football Club. This is simple, all you have to do is to OPEN an account anywhere in the world and send me its detail for me to arrangethe proper money transfer paperwork, and facilitate the transfer. But first, you must send me your stock. The money willthen be paid into this Account.

There is no risk at all, and all the paper work for this transaction will be done by me using my position and connections in the banks in Nigeria. This business transaction is guaranteed, and the transfer will be for 400 MILLION POUNDS, as advised by our insider in the bank.

If you areinterested, please reply immediately through my personal email sending thefollowing details: (1) Your Full Name/Address (2) Your Private Telephone/faxNumber. Please observe the utmost confidentiality, and be rest assured that thistransaction would be most profitable for both of us because I shall require your assistance to invest some of my share in your country.

I look forward to yourearliest reply.

Yours,

Mr.David Mark.